Granny on Board Read online

Three young men moved in and got between all the combatants.

  I pointed at Fiona and Lauren. “These two killed Margaret Underwood!”

  “No, we didn’t. You killed Georgina!” Lauren shouted.

  Then we were all shouting at once, hurling accusations and counteraccusations.

  Tony Iron looked at each of us, not sure who to believe.

  “Heeelp!” Georgina’s voice came from below.

  We all looked over the railing.

  Several feet below us, and still high above the churning water of the propeller, Georgina hung tangled on the flagpole. She had fallen in just the right way that the flagpole had caught her dress, the flag itself tangling with her to help stop her fall.

  It was a million-to-one stroke of luck, and it had to happen to someone like her.

  “Heeelp!” she cried again. I heard a tearing sound, and her body lurched downward, stopping after a few inches.

  “Her dress is tearing,” I said. “We have to get her now.”

  “I’ll call security!” one of the young men said, rushing to find the nearest courtesy phone. I knew help wouldn’t come in time.

  “We have to save her!” Fiona cried.

  I spotted a ring-shaped life preserver hanging from the railing nearby. I hobbled over and grabbed it. It had a long line of thin but strong rope. The other end was affixed to the steel railing. I got right above Georgina, who was flailing in panic and only succeeding in tearing her dress more, and lowered it down. With my aching elbow, I didn’t dare try to throw it.

  “Get it around you and hang on!” I called.

  “Take care, Georgina!” Lauren shouted. She and Fiona were right at the edge of the railing, looking panicked. A minute before, they had been trying to kill us, and now all they cared about was their leader.

  The life preserver got down to her, and she stuck it around her middle. The two remaining young men and Tony Iron hauled on the rope. She didn’t budge. They pulled again, and there was a tearing sound as her dress fell away.

  “Oh my,” Octavian said, averting his eyes. He didn’t need to, because that wasn’t the only thing that tore.

  The flag tore, too, and as she was hauled up, she wrapped Old Glory around herself to hide her old … glory.

  “Now that’s what I call a patriot,” Tony Iron said as he helped her over the railing.

  Georgina gave him a grin. “That’s me: red, white, and true blue.” She pointed at Lauren and Fiona. “Call security, and have those two arrested. They killed Margaret Underwood and tried to frame me for it!”

  Lauren burst into tears, real ones this time. I think. She was really good at faking emotions. She had played me like a fiddle, and I had gone after the wrong woman, almost getting myself and Octavian killed in the process.

  Oh, and Georgina, I guess I should count her.

  “We did it for you, Georgina,” Lauren bawled. “We did it all for you!”

  Fiona nodded. “Maggie was destroying everything. You know how the judge let Wesley off? That was because of her.”

  “No, that was because of your lousy reputation,” I cut in.

  The three “ladies” ignored me.

  Georgina sobbed. “I never wanted you to kill her. Now look what you’ve done! How can we win the next tournament if two of the Six Mouseyketeers are in jail?”

  In. Credible.

  “We’re sorry. We are so sorry,” Fiona said, adding her tears to Lauren’s.

  “But why did you implicate Alicia?” Georgina demanded. “She was your friend!”

  “She was beginning to take Brenda’s side,” Fiona said. “Stealing the idea of the team name from me! I switched our bowling balls as the stevedore took our luggage while we waited in line. I’d been going into her cabin to check her vitals. Last night, when I realized she wasn’t going to tell anyone about her bowling ball having blood on it, I decided to get rid of the evidence. I told her to have a long, hot shower before taking a nap. That’s when I got rid of the ball. I just took it on deck, waited until no one was looking, and chucked it overboard.”

  “We did it all for you, Georgina,” Lauren insisted. “And when these two old bats started sniffing around, we had to divert them to protect you.”

  “That’s simply not true,” Octavian said. “You spun that tale about the plastic spiders to get us off the scent, to make us think Georgina was the murderer. You may have started by doing it for your little group, but when we got too close, you sold out the woman you so admire.”

  Lauren’s mouth worked, unable to come up with a reply. Just then the ship’s security showed up, three burly sailors who looked confused as to just who to arrest.

  Fiona cleared them up on that account by collapsing at their feet. “We did it for Georgina!” she shrieked. “We did it for Georgina!”

  Georgina leveled her finger at Fiona then at Lauren, like a witch pronouncing a curse. Considering what she said next, she might as well have been. “Lauren, Fiona, you are no longer my friends.”

  Security took the two wailing women away.

  Georgina put an arm around Tony Iron and gave him a sultry smile. “When you fish a mermaid out of the sea, isn’t it traditional to give her a kiss?”

  “Lady, I have had some of the sexiest, most alluring women in the world throw themselves at me.” Tony Iron detached himself none too gently. “And you are not one of them.”

  He put his arms around his young male companions and sauntered off.

  Fifteen

  Late the next morning, after a very long night explaining everything to the ship’s security and seeing the two murderers confined to the ship’s small jail cell, Octavian and I walked along the deck. We found ourselves drifting to the prow, where Maggie had paid tribute to the one happy period of her life and got killed for it.

  “So petty,” Octavian muttered.

  “Most murders are petty when you really look at them. People rarely kill each other for any good reason. They usually kill because they’re selfish and the victim threatens their selfish desires.”

  Octavian shook his head, looking out across the glittering Caribbean. “What an ugly world you had to live in, Barbara.”

  “Yes, working at the CIA could get ugly at times, but we were trying to make the world less ugly.” I cozied up to him. “And my life is looking a lot more handsome these days.”

  He sighed. “It’s too bad we couldn’t save Maggie.”

  “We didn’t know she was in danger until she was already dead. And we saved Georgina’s life, not to mention our own.”

  He looked at me. “I want you to know that I have never hit a lady before in all my life.”

  I put my hand on his. “You still haven’t hit a lady.”

  Octavian nodded and looked back out to sea, not speaking for a moment. Then he turned and kissed me. “Promise me one thing,” he said.

  “Anything. I think you’ve earned it,” I replied, kissing him again.

  “Promise me the next time we go on vacation that no one will get murdered.”

  I smiled, relieved. I was beginning to wonder if there would be a next vacation, considering how this one turned out.

  “Unfortunately I can’t promise that. How about I pay for the next vacation? You have a birthday coming up, I suppose.”

  “They come faster and faster with each passing year.”

  “Hmmm, they do indeed. All right, it’s settled. I’ll pay for the vacation.”

  “It’s not about who pays. It’s about the bloody murders and hunting after suspects,” Octavian grumbled.

  “I suppose it’s not everyone’s idea of a romantic getaway.”

  “No, it is not. The strange thing is it’s really piqued my appetite. Why don’t we go to our cabins, freshen up, and head on over to that twenty-four-hour buffet?”

  “All right.”

  A few minutes later, coming out of my cabin, I saw Octavian already in the hallway. Georgina was just entering her cabin, casting a smile over her shoulder at him.

&n
bsp; I went up to him after her door closed. “Don’t tell me she was flirting with you after all this.”

  He looked aggrieved. “Even worse. She asked me for my Facebook.”

  “You poor thing! What did you do?”

  Octavian hung his head. “I said I didn’t have an account.”

  “But you do?”

  He nodded. “Yeah. My kids made me get it.”

  “I’ve been spared. My son thinks it’s stupid, my daughter is too busy, and my grandson says it’s for old people. I only got an account yesterday to check on Maggie’s status updates. Do you actually feel guilty about lying to Georgina?”

  Octavian smiled, looking quite content. “No, it was just a passing phase, like punching a bowling-ball-wielding murderer intent on killing me. I have an idea. Let’s stuff ourselves at that buffet, and tonight let’s go hear the world’s greatest has-beens and dance like a pair of old fools pretending they’re sixteen. And tomorrow we finally dock at a beautiful Caribbean island. I say we go on shore, drink some tropical fruit juice—no more alcohol, for God’s sake have mercy—and then we walk hand in hand on a pristine beach while the locals try to sell us shell necklaces and straw hats at inflated prices.”

  “Sounds good to me,” I replied, taking him by the arm as we walked down the hallway.

  I was wrong. It wasn’t just good. It was wonderful.

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  About the Author

  Harper Lin is a USA TODAY bestselling cozy mystery author. When she's not reading or writing mysteries, she loves going to yoga classes, hiking, and hanging out with her family and friends.

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  If you like this series, you might also enjoy my other series:

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  • The Pink Cupcake Mysteries (ongoing series): A new divorcée sells delicious cupcakes from a pink food truck, to the chagrin of her ex-husband. Each book includes cupcake recipes.

  • The Patisserie Mysteries (9 books): An heiress to a famous French patisserie chain takes over the family business, while using her status as a Parisian socialite to solve murders in high society. Each book includes French pastry recipes.

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